The value of little things

During the pandemic, like so many people all over the world, I was forced to isolate myself at home. Although the relationship with some of my clients continued via the Internet, the real “work” that needed to be done during that period regarded me and the behavior patterns I had acquired. I no longer had a reason not to help my children with their homework, nor find things for them to do, or care for elderly parents, or else help my wife in the kitchen by inventing new menus… Before that time, I had underestimated the value of these small daily gestures in helping us understand ourselves. Suddenly, I had the opportunity to discover fundamental dimensions of our existence. But perhaps prayer – the one-to-one relationship with God – was the most important discovery I made during this period. I had begun to neglect it because I was so busy with my research and work: it had become one of the many things I tried to fit into my day alongside so many others. Suddenly, there were no limitations on my time, and I began to reflect on life, death, hope… I don’t know what it is like for other people, but for me, this forced exile has become a real school, more effective than many books I could have read or courses I could have followed.

(M.V. – Switzerland)

Always rebuilding love

After decades of a happy and loving marriage, I realized that I was becoming intolerant towards my wife. She often doesn’t agree with the things I do and always tells me so. One day, after hearing her saying the same thing twice, I felt angry and firmly told her that I knew what I had to do because she had already told me. Naturally, she was upset by my attitude, but so was I. I told her I was sorry, but inside of me, I felt a great pain because I hadn’t respected her or accepted that she was aging. I wondered how many things I say and do hurt my wife. Soon afterwards, our niece and her partner came to visit, and we told them what had happened. As they listened, for no apparent reason, our niece began to cry, and her partner took her hand and began to caress it. After a few moments of silence, they confided to us that they had decided to split up because of their differences in character. However, listening to our story, they were moved by the beauty of growing old together and always trying to rebuild love.

(P.T. – Hungary)

To listen and understand

When I think back over 25 years of caring for my patients, I feel like I’ve done nothing more than listen to them. I always remember the woman who came to see me when I first began to work as a GP (General Practitioner) or primary care physician. She had previously visited so many other hospitals in Switzerland and Italy. She described one detail about her personal history, and I realized that this could be the key to the ailments from which she had suffered for over 15 years. When I asked her if she had ever spoken to other doctors about this, she said that it had never come to her mind before. She added, “It’s only now that you are listening to me that I’ve remembered it.” Her visit was more useful than any professional training could have been. Yes, because listening, especially today, when everything is done quickly, should always correspond to “understanding.” I have been learning this for the last 25 years, and the lesson continues! Listening is an expression of the love which Christ exemplified: to be empty of yourself to be able to welcome the other person.

(Ugo – Italy)

Savoring each moment

When, after the last tests, the doctor told me that the cancer had reappeared, my first thought was for the family – for our children and grandchildren. My husband and I talked about the situation calmly, and we decided to live whatever time I have left in the best possible way and so leave them with a legacy of love lived faithfully till the end. We have begun to experience days that are certainly marked by pain but are also filled with a new color and warmth. Not only has love increased among all, but I would also say that we are learning to live the time by “savoring each moment.” Every gesture is unique because it could be the last, and so could each phone call, every word said. The attention we give to each other, the tone of our voices, the attempts to create harmony between us… everything has taken on a new value. My husband is surprised at how much joy we are experiencing at the moment, and he often says, “It is the only good we can leave to our children!” In the moments dedicated to prayer, we feel heaven opening up, because it has become a real act of thanksgiving.

(G.C. – Italy)

Compiled by Stefania Tanesini

(taken from Il Vangelo del Giorno, Città Nuova, year VI, no.5, September-October 2020)