At the Angelus address last December 27, 2020, we heard Pope Francis speaking to families. As he often does, he invited husband and wife, after a quarrel in which some dishes fly, to make peace before going to bed. But here, he used an image that really struck us, saying, “The cold war of the next day is very dangerous.” The cold war: resentment masquerading as indifference, a silence that screams, imaginary dialogues in one’s mind, full of episodes that one had already forgiven (but evidently not forgotten…). A fuse always ready to explode with who knows what consequences.

So let’s end the war while it’s still hot, with one of the three magic words that must always accompany family life: “Sorry.” In moments of fatigue, especially in this special period of “close encounters,” due to the pandemic, the “cold war” is one of the strongest temptations for our family: in the evening, we are tired (maybe another reason we quarrel) and it seems to us that sleeping on it is the best solution. However, this is not so: we have experienced it many times and, as Einstein says, “Madness is doing the same thing over and over again, always the same thing, expecting different results.” So better to have a lukewarm peace than a cold war. Even if the situation seems far from resolved, to say sorry is a good start for regaining trust in each other.

Lucia and Massimo Massiminio