Do not despair! Your concern is indeed a common one among adolescents. The sadness of being excluded from relationships with others, can make you feel of little value to them.
Another cause of loneliness may come from the fact that you’re building your identity now, and somehow it seems to depend on the judgment of others. The world wants you to be good at everything, to be first in everything. But perhaps it can come as a shock, a deception to you, to realize that we all have flaws and weaknesses.
Another factor is that technology has become a huge part of our lives. It’s an indication of the quality of friendships in this generation. It is almost as if by spotting a face in a crowd and clicking one simple button online, we can become their friends. Also we may think that having more friends is better than cultivating a few friends who are loyal.
This is a problem. If this is a kind of friendships, teenagers have, how are we supposed to know whom to trust? “The present generation relies so much on technology that even at a simple dinner with friends, people can’t leave their electronic devices alone.
If this goes on, the relationship people have will break up and they will no longer have anyone left whom they can trust. In a survey among peers about what they thought being a friend means, most of them answered with some mention of trust, being there for each other, and being with someone whom is fun.
If that is true, then do their friends on Facebook, for example, come under those categories? The answer is no.
There is a need to raise awareness about the true meaning of real friendship, and hopefully prevent people from picking up on their phones when they’re with friends.
By helping them realize what being a friend means, they will be able to break away from their delusional bubble on-screen and enter the real world where there are people who truly care about them.”
(“The Life of Megan” http://blogs.yis.ac.jp/18mcauleym/2015/03/08/virtualfriends- vs-internet-friends) So here’s a tip: focus on your strengths and the positive things you see in others (and try to communicate these things to them).
Confront your loneliness by reflecting some minutes a day and playing down your defects. If you believe in God, offer it to Jesus for he definitely knows you better than you do. With regard to the judgment of others, try to open up new relationships.
This opening will be generous support and help to your comrades … There is nothing more powerful than love for receiving recognition and support. Open yourself up to others and do not worry if this openness will not be immediately reciprocated. Love is a powerful antidote to loneliness.
As St. John of the Cross said: “Where there is no love, put love and you will find love.”
